To my Mum, Nellie, for not being like Bridgets

Acknowledgements

With particular thanks to Charlie Leadbeater for first suggesting the column at the Independent.Thanks too to Gillon Aitken, Richard Coles, Scarlett Curtis, the Fielding family, Piers, Paula and Sam Fletcher, Emma Freud, Georgia Garrett, Sharon Maguire, Jon Turner and Daniel Woods for

inspiration and support, and especially, as ever, to Richard Curtis.

Contents

New Years Resolutions

JANUARY An Exceptionally Bad Start

FEBRUARY Valentines Day Massacre

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