ONCE upon a most early time was a Neolithic man. He was not a Jute or an Angle, or even a Dravidian, which he might well have been, Best Beloved, but never mind why. He was a Primitive, and he lived cavily in a Cave, and he wore very few clothes, and he couldnt read and he couldnt write and he didnt want to, and except when he was hungry he was quite happy. His name was Tegumai Bopsulai, and that means, Man-who-does-not-put-his-foot- forward-in-a-hurry; but we, O Best Beloved, will call him Tegumai, for short. And his wifes name was Teshumai Tewindrow, and that means, Lady-who-asks-a-very-many-questions; but we, O Best Beloved, will call her Teshumai, for short. And his little girl-daughters name was Taffimai Metallumai, and that means, Small-person-without-any-manners-who-ought-to-be-spanked; but Im going to call her Taffy. And she was Tegumai Bopsulais Best Beloved and her own Mummys Best Beloved, and she was not spanked half as much as was good for her; and they were all three very happy. As soon as Taffy could run about she went everywhere with her Daddy Tegumai, and sometimes they would not come home to the Cave till they were hungry, and then Teshumai Tewindrow would say, Where in the world have you two been to, to get so shocking dirty? Really, my Tegumai, youre no better than my Taffy.

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